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Andrew Dice Coulter
by Patrick Hurley [scriptwriter] 6/28/07
Shock oratory is not a recent phenomenon on the planet. You could build a case for Goliath talking smack to David in the valley of Elah just before he forgot to duck and was soon a headless commentary to God’s greatness. Over the years we have seen thousands of interviews, literary passages and people in the news perfecting the art of rudeness at someone else’s expense. But, no one in recent history has exemplified the art of personal slime quite like Ann Hart Coulter. She would make Mike Tyson blush and that is hard to do. Look up the definition of “shameless” in the dictionary and you will see over a hundred pictures of Ann. If you are a liberal, a Democrat, overweight, have a child who has died or use deodorant, you are on her hit list. You would be better served meeting OJ Simpson in a dark alley. This broad makes up her own rules whenever she opens her mouth and it is not a pretty sight.
Contributor
Patrick Hurley
Patrick Hurley is an independent conservative thinker living
in Orange County, California. He has addressed over six million
people in 47 states nationwide and won three Emmy awards for
television comedy.[go
to Hurley index]
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I am pretty conservative when it comes to politics. A lot of times, I will politely listen to a Democrat who may lean to the left just to support the political process. I have witnessed dirty politics on more than a few occasions in my life by both parties. I try to be fair to the truth of someone no matter what their political affiliation. Was there ever a more corrupt President than LBJ? Yes. His name was Richard Nixon. Was there ever someone who lied more than Nixon? Aye again. Bill Clinton. And so it goes…
What sets Ann Coulter apart from the rest of the commentators in the public eye is that she has a different set of weapons in her arsenal than anyone else. Some political pundits use the epee, the light sword. Others may tie their political foes into knots with a cleverly devised rope pattern. Still others will shoot you with a single ball derringer hoping to inflict some damage. Not Ann Coulter.
She will not hesitate to pull out a 155 mm howitzer which not only gets into your head but removes it cleanly from the top of your neck. She is not interested in repartee. She prefers annihilation. You want debate? Jefferson vs. Madison was intriguing. You want vaporization? Ann’s your girl.
The latest incident involving Ms. Coulter and the rest of civilized society occurred on “Hardball” with Chris Mathews on Monday night. Ann was waxing destructively eloquent as usual and there was a surprise caller to the show: Elizabeth Edwards, the wife of Presidential candidate John Edwards. Basically, the dialogue went something like this:
Elizabeth: “Ann, could you please stop the personal attacks?”
Ann: “Could you please die!”
Elizabeth: “No, seriously, I am asking you to stop attacking my family…”
Ann: “So you want me to shut up so your scummy husband can continue to rip off insurance companies?”
Elizabeth: “Your approach just hurts the credibility of the political process…”
Ann: “No, I won’t come to your funeral!”
Okay, I paraphrased a tad. But, you get the gist of it. Ann was as repentant as a lioness that had just devoured a graceful antelope in three slashing bites. Elizabeth Edwards came off looking noble and kind. Ann fumed and looked peeved. Advantage: Edwards. By far. I sat there as I watched the video and said to myself, “Thank you God that I am not married to this woman. I would not live through the honeymoon.” There is more grace in John McEnroe’s body than there is in one square inch of Ann Coulter’s tongue. This is no longer about political punditry or spirited debate; this is about meanness of the lowest common denominator. Ann does not need to tone it down, she needs intervention. I am not even sure which political party, ideology or individual could get through to her at this stage of her life. Dick Cheney with a shotgun?
She has lost me. She has lost most of America. If she doesn’t get help she will eventually lose herself.
Ann Coulter is no longer about politics. It is about her soul that is hell bent on a self-destructive course to the one place people like her hate to visit permanently…
Irrelevance. ExileStreet
copyright
2007 Patrick Hurley
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